Of Sour Coffee and Stained Notebooks

 The heat bears down on my skin as I feel that familiar sticky moisture on my skin, dripping down my neck and soaking my back. Summer is my least favorite season. At least in the winter (at least where I live) I have the option to go outside without feeling constantly miserable provided I wear enough clothing. Not to mention the mosquitoes. God, I hate mosquitoes. Where am I going with this? To be honest, I don't really have much of an idea. I haven't written in a good while now, and since my last update there's been a lot going on. Exams are done, results have been obtained, and all I need to do is wait for the university of my choice to get back to me after I sent them my results. Speaking of sending universities my results, I had this image in my head that universities are all old-timey institutions, but it makes sense that most of them these days accept photocopies of documents over email. It saves time and money, and I'm sure a lot of students appreciate this. Bure...

 Hm. Coming back to this, I'm not sure what to write. A video popped up on my feed about the power of 'Mini Habits', and I was promptly reminded of this thing I was trying to do with mini-habits to accumulate progress. Guess I forgot about that. It'd be nice to write more, to be able to solidify my thoughts more, but at the same time I haven't really seen the point of just writing so much in general. Does there need to be a point? I guess writing often makes me feel accomplished? That's something to think about.

Going through books at the library, I'd keep finding that I couldn't really finish them without trying hard. I thought there was something wrong with my attention span. Maybe there is. Not until I got a book series that would siphon an hour at least from my day each time I picked it up that I realised that those other books just weren't right for me. It's a wonderful experience, finding the one thing that matches with you so well. But you have to go through a lot of things that don't work out with you, too.  Disappointment, self-doubt, impatience. Of course when applied to bigger things, like work or relationships, those are amplified ten-fold. Is there something wrong with you? I don't think so. There can be a million reasons why you don't click. It's all part of the process in finding the right friends, or a client that actually happens to be interested in what you have to offer. I guess sales people learn that lesson quickly. Is this another 'Stop...

As usual, time is flying by on a weekly basis while the days drag out. It's been weeks since my last entry, despite my hope that I'd be writing regularly. Instead, I've been studying for my exams, drawing, and taking up boxing classes. When I started the blog at the beginning of March, my daily routine was a lot different. Writing was one of the main goals of each day, as well as spending time into learning how to code. My exercise goals were more bodyweight workout focused, with pushups and squats being my main bar, while now I focus on running certain distances so I can improve my stamina to be better at boxing. Nowadays I certainly study and read a lot more, though I do think it would be better if I wrote as much as I did in March. When we focus on one thing, we're saying no to other things. It must be a way of life that we sway from one side of life to another at times. Sometimes on a daily scale, sometimes on a monthly scale. Days gone by, the feeling that we'v...

 I am glad to inform you that it is about half past 9 am today, and I carried out my morning routine similarly to yesterday, however with one little hiccup. I checked my phone briefly before getting out of bed, and instead of the morning freshness I felt last morning, I was thrust back into the feeling that I was in a rush. A sort of thought cloud, I suppose. I managed to complete the rest of my morning routine, and a good session into the Farseer Trilogy's world has brought me back to a better mental state, but it's opened my eyes to how my headspace has been the whole time.  During days where I'd wake up in the afternoon, and I'd immediately sink myself into the waters of the internet, I'd have had no respite from this clouded feeling. It's enlightening, slightly. It's funny because it reminds me of a scene where the protagonist of Royal Assassin, Fitz, gets drugged up unintentionally and spends a good part of the day in a waking dream. I should be more aw...

 I've forgotten about this feeling. It really is something else. There can be qualms about sleep schedules, but I'm reminded of how good it feels to wake up early. Not the immediate five minutes of grogginess, obviously, but after that.  I woke up at 6am today, idling about for a good 15 minutes before I managed to go out for a run. After coming home and completing the rest of my morning routine, I came out of my meditation and looked at the clock. Only fifteen past seven. I was in no rush, so I decided to read a little before "starting my day". Maybe an hour and a half or so passed as I immersed myself in Robin Hobb's "Royal Assassin", a bit more than I intended, but I felt no guilt at all whatsoever. After a shower and breakfast, I am now glad to tell you it is now 9:26am as I am typing this. Mixing an early morning with a "Dopamine Fast" has been doing wonders for me.Not only does my mind feel "clean", but also I feel like I get to...